Tattoos, tattoos. More permanent than most marriages, and gotten with considerably less thought on many occasions. Let’s talk about them, shall we?
I am going to speak candidly, these are my opinions, if I am slamming any one of your decisions, know that I do not judge you as a person, this is simply how I feel about tattoos and not about the people wearing them. I don’t currently have any tattoos, doesn’t mean I won’t ever get one.
I’m not against tattoos, I’m not for tattoos. My stance on this is: I’m very much for long-term thinking and planning. If that leads you to getting a well-crafted tattoo you are proud of and that isn’t horrifying to the general public, great! If that leads you to never getting one, that works too.
Let’s talk about the content of tattoos: If you have a relative who has died and a tattoo is how you want to commemorate them, I understand. Do your thing. Names of living people do not deserve a place on your body unless they are your children. Don’t put your sister’s name on you, your dad, your cousin, your best friend, your ex girlfriend. It’s creepy.
About the girlfriend/boyfriend tattoo: What a horrible idea. Horrible, horrible, horrible. Imagine that you’re dating someone, and you’re in love. Congratulations! You rock! you know what doesn’t rock?? Getting their name tattooed on your body in the heat of the moment, and then 2 years later breaking up, eventually finding your spouse, and having children with someone else. Someday your kids will see the tattoo, and be like, “who is that tattoo about?” And then you have to tell your bright eyed children that you will forever be marked by another human’s name who is not their mom or dad. Your future spouse will have to look at your ex’s name forever. What a cruel, cruel thing to do.
The timing of tattoos is also incredibly important: drunk tattoos, while hilarious memories, are often tragic. Don’t decide to get a tattoo after you’ve slammed back 6 drinks in one hour. (5 drinks is totally fine) ((Just kidding)). If you have already decided to get a tattoo but need a little booze to, idk, numb the pain or whatever, that’s different. Do your thing. Also, sit on your tattoo idea for at least a year before getting it. If you still want it JUST AS BADLY after a year, that’s a good sign. But wait for yourself to enter a new stage of maturity, so that you know that the tattoo will transcend all life changes and be something you’ll want to brag about with your besties at your retirement party.
Where are you getting your tattoo? I’d highly recommend avoiding neck tattoos and face tattoos, but apparently that’s just me!! I also personally would only get mine in hidden places because I’d never want my tattoos to limit where I could get a job or who I could keep in my social network. I would want to keep mine small and elegant, not overtaking my entire body in a distracting way.
Is your tattoo trendy? DON’T GET IT. Trends don’t last. Unless you’re getting one tattoo per new trend as a way to become a collage of eras, don’t do it. The geometric look might be in now, but might look super dated in the future.
ALSO! You might gain/lose weight! It’s a possibility! With age and weight fluctuation, your tattoo can become distorted. How much would that suck? My old teacher used to joke that she wanted to put the flag on her bicep, so that when she got older and her skin got saggy and flappy, she could “wave the flag.” Takes notes, kids.
Alternatives to tattoos:
You want to look at this design everyday? Get a refrigerator magnet of it. Frame it and put it on your wall. Get a temporary tattoo. Make it a sticker and put it on your laptop. Make it the cover of your notebooks. (I thought I had more alternatives than I actually do.) Obsess over it in anyway that pleases you, just don’t make it permanent unless that’s the RIGHT thing for you to do!
Here is some of my tattoo criteria:
- Wait at least a year after thinking of your tattoo idea
- Don’t get someone’s name unless they’re dead, or your children.
- Keep it hidden unless you have a job locked in for the rest of your life, and if your employers don’t mind.
- Make sure it’s not trendy
- Don’t make the decision drunk
- Make sure you get it because it’s deeply meaningful to you and how you identify yourself, because it will represent you for the rest of your life.
- Don’t get it “just because you wanted one”
- I’d recommend not getting one with your best friend, because people have falling-outs every time. You don’t want to be permanently linked to someone who becomes your arch-nemesis. That’s just dumb.
- Pay the full price, at a well-known parlor. You want this to be the highest quality possible.
- Let it heal properly.
Let me know if I’ve forgotten anything.
So these are most of my thoughts. I enjoy ranting in posts, so this was pretty stream of consciousness. I mean all of it with love, I hope this can help people, if you don’t agree with me, that’s cool! I gotta do what’s best for me, you gotta do what’s best for you. Thank you for making it to the end of this post, tell me your thoughts in the comments!